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[deadkord]

[ Call | Text | Voicemail | Email | Action | Whatever ]


Anyone who calls Ted's phone will hear the following voicemail message, obviously in Ted's voice:

"The wireless customer you're trying to reach has not set up their voicemail. Please leave a message after the beep. Beep."

BEEP

Comments

[deadkord]

...You do know I’m not exactly the most in touch with my own emotions half the time, right? Not saying I’m not willing to help, just... pointing that out.

[snarkboy]

Sir, I know a lot of people in this world but of the handful I trust the most, they're either you, your successor, Batman, or the person in question.

[ There's other people he likes, sure. People he'd gladly have watch his back in battle, like the Justice League, or people he enjoys talking to, like his Network friends, but for this kind of thing the number is small. ]

If you really think Batman is more in touch with his feelings than you are and open to having that conversation, by all means direct me his way.

[deadkord]

Excellent point.

[ He sighs and leans back against the couch. ]

...In my experience, if you’ve gotten as far as wondering if you’ve got feelings for someone, you probably do. But usually the bigger question is what do you do about it.

[snarkboy]

[ Skeets thinks about this for a moment. It has an odd sort of logic to it. ]

What would you do?

[deadkord]

That depends on a lot of things. Who it is, what’s going on in both of your lives, if you think they’re interested as well, what you want out of the relationship, what they want...

[ He sighs. ]

Romance is complicated. People are complicated. And I don’t think that’s exclusive to organic folks.

[snarkboy]

[ Skeets nods. ]

I can believe that, sir.

This someone is going through a lot, and I'm uncertain what would happen if the Porter gets fixed and I return to robotic body. I wasn't exactly made to attract beyond "ooh shiny".

[ He sighs. ]

But from what I know, bottling up feelings or pining unnecessarily is... unhealthy.

[deadkord]

Are they human or...?

[ There are a lot of non-human options around, but Ted’s been assuming Skeets’ would-be paramour is probably robotic. ]

Unless this is something that’s only come up while you’ve been human, I’m not sure I see the issue with your usual chassis being “attractive” or not.

[ Yeah, he air quotes around attractive. ]

[snarkboy]

[ That's a good question, actually. Did he like Kaytoo before?
Or did this only start after he became human? ]

I only noticed my feelings may be less-than-platonic in nature recently, while we've both been like this.

[ He gestures to his whole human body thing he got going on. ]

It's... possible it may have started before. I'm uncertain.

[deadkord]

Well, that's probably the first thing you're going to need to figure out. Assuming this whole Porter screw up isn't permanent.

[ He doesn't want to think about the permanency of this situation for a whole ton of reasons, though, so it's time to deflect. ]

So are you going to tell me who it is, or am I going to have to try to find out on my own? Keep in mind, the latter is probably a lot of work for me and ultimately embarrassing for you.

[snarkboy]

I was under the impression that Batman was the detective, sir.

[ Skeets stands there, calculating the risk vs reward vs Ted's ability to be as annoying as humanly possible. ]

I would like to stress that this is only a possibility. It's well within reason that I may be misinterpreting my internal signals - it's difficult to ascertain the degree in which one feels something especially when one lacks experience.

[ He's stalling. ]

[deadkord]

That doesn't make me want to know who it is any less!

[ He unlocks his phone again and starts slowly reading aloud as he types. ]

"Hey Network, how many of you are robots? And how many of you know my friend Skeets..."

[snarkboy]

No! No, that's unnecessary, sir --

[ Good news everyone, Skeets has discovered a new feeling! It's wanting to die and/or turn invisible through embarrassment. Let's all applaud Skeets for this profound discovery. ]

He's called Kaytoo.

[deadkord]

[ Luckily for Skeets, he wasn't actually typing it into the Network app, but rater into a note file, just to mess with him. Still, Skeets doesn't need to know that. ]

Kaytoo? Interesting name. So, what's he like?

[snarkboy]

It's short for K-2SO. He's a security droid who I initially found very relatable though very much his own person. I've found him very easy to exchange information with.

[ It was refreshing, in a way, to have someone to talk to who seemed to understand things from a perspective similar to his own. The admission that Skeets considered him a person almost immediately is also a step away from how things were once upon a time, in the 25th century.

Skeets considers what else to say about him for a moment, tilting his head. ]

There's a certainty in his behaviour, and a determination to do what he feels he needs to, but I've observed moments of vulnerability as well. He's observant, but with fascinating observations and a subtle sense of humour. He can be very dry in a way that I appreciate. He particularly appears to take delight at poking at his friends, but I know that he cares very deeply for them.

It's a little bit frustrating, actually, how easily he'll put his own needs aside for the benefit of others.

[ He falls silent again, thinking about how exhausted he's been recently, and how Skeets has had to fight to make sure he takes care of himself -- like Skeets fights to make sure his other friends take care of themselves too.

He's a little bit unaware that while he's been talking about Kaytoo he's had a fond smile up to this point. ]

[deadkord]

...Well, clearly we should've started with this, because yeah, you've got feelings for him alright.

[snarkboy]

Ah.

[ Skeets blinks, suddenly feeling a bit exposed. Though, considering normally people couldn't see what he was thinking on his face, he was more exposed than usual. ]

Is it truly that obvious?

[deadkord]

'Fraid so. And it doesn't sound like this is exactly a new development, either.

[ Ted knows a thing or two about not noticing feelings for someone until well after they've become long established. ]

So what do you want to do about it?

[snarkboy]

[ Skeets finally moves and sits down on the couch with Ted, a bit heavily. He folds his hands in his lap, squeezing his knuckles a little. ]

I'm uncertain. For the moment, I'd prefer more... data -- more time to process it on my own. I don't doubt your judgement, but I'd like to be able to observe my own emotions now that I have a better perspective on what they may be.

[ In a way, he's oddly fascinated by the idea of having a crush on someone. That he could feel that way. He wants to experience it for himself, and figure out in due time if it fades or grows stronger. ]

You've been very helpful, thank you, Ted.

[deadkord]

It's been known to happen, from time to time.

[ He watches Skeets for a minute, as unused to being able to read expressions on his friend as Skeets is to having them in the first place. ]

Lemme know if I need to give him the shovel talk, though. I've always wanted to be on the giving end of one of those.

[snarkboy]

[ He grimaces. ]

Please don't give him the shovel talk, sir.

[ Pause. Telling Ted not to do something = increased possibility of Ted doing the thing. ]

If something were to happen, I already have his schematics. I'd be perfectly capable of handling the issue myself, presuming he's ever eventually returned to his own chassis.

[ skeets no ]

[deadkord]

...Wow, Skeets, that's... ice cold.

[snarkboy]

I'd only deploy such tactics if he caused legitimate harm.

[ Because that. Helps. ]

Otherwise I would probably use Booster's method of coping with emotional turmoil and attempt to eat an entire tub of ice cream.